What games did you play, and who did you play them with?

Why this question works

Play is pure fun to remember. There is nothing heavy in it, which makes it a wonderful first question for a grandparent who says they have nothing interesting to tell. Everyone played something, and everyone remembers who cheated, who always won and who had to go home when the streetlights came on.

The second half of the question, who did you play with, is where the story lives. It brings in brothers and sisters, cousins, the neighbor kids and the best friend from two doors down. It also shows how childhood worked back then: how far children were allowed to roam, what they made their toys from and how they filled a long afternoon with almost nothing. Grandchildren find this fascinating, because it is so different from their own days and yet so familiar.

How to ask it

This one is best asked with children in the room. If your grandparent can teach a game instead of just describing it, let them. A bag of marbles, a deck of cards or a piece of sidewalk chalk can turn a conversation into an afternoon. Take a short video if they are willing; hands remember rules that words forget.

Keep the tone playful. Ask who was the best at it, and whether your grandparent was a good sport. Gentle teasing is welcome here. If they mention a game you have never heard of, ask for the rules step by step and write them down, odd names and all. Those rules are part of the family record too.

Other ways to word it

• What did you and the neighborhood kids play outside?
• What was your favorite game, and were you any good at it?
• What did you do for fun on a rainy day?
• What toys did you have, and which ones did you make yourself?

Follow-up ideas

• Can you teach me how to play it?
• Who was your main playmate, and where are they now?
• Where did you play: the street, a field, a vacant lot, the barn?
• What time did you have to be home, and how did you know?
• Did the boys and girls play together or separately?
• Was there a game that always ended in an argument?
• Did you ever get hurt playing? What happened?

An example answer

This is an invented example, written to show the kind of detail to listen for. Your grandma’s answer will be her own.

"We played kick the can every summer evening until it was too dark to see the can. There were about a dozen of us on our street, all ages, and the big kids had to let the little ones play or nobody's mother would allow it. My brother was the fastest, and I was the best hider. I once stayed inside a rain barrel so long they gave up and went home."

"On rainy days my sister and I played jacks on the kitchen floor. We had one rubber ball between us, and when it rolled under the icebox that was the end of the game until my father got home to move it. I could do tensies without a miss. I think I still could."

What to write down

Write down the name of each game and its rules, step by step, in the order your grandparent explained them. List the playmates by name and nickname, and note where they played and what time everyone had to be home. If a rhyme or a chant went with the game, get the words exactly. A short video of your grandparent demonstrating is worth keeping alongside the written rules.

A question like this one appears in the childhood chapter of the Tell Me Your Story journals for grandparents, with a full page for the answer. It pairs nicely with the journal's 120 quick memory questions, which ask for short answers about the little things of everyday life.

See the Tell Me Your Story, Grandpa journal or the Tell Me Your Story, Grandma journal. For more ideas, read questions to ask your grandparents or browse childhood questions.